Since American Horror Story began slaying us back in 2011, we’ve never been able to sleep with all the lights off — and we LOVE it! The show manages to freak us the hell out while making us question everything we thought we knew in the world, and consistently has great writing, story lines, and phenomenal acting by a diverse cast. Here are the things that happen on every season of American Horror Story.
1. You’ll get REALLY excited for the premiere.
Like, really excited. You have a viewing party with your friends, because, how could you NOT?!
2. You’ll wonder what craziness is about to unfold this season.
3. Something minor will happen that will scare the crap out of you.
A knock at the door or a jump in the music and you’ll be spilling your popcorn and laughing hysterically.
4. Evan Peters will play a weirdo or a murderer, and you’ll feel uncomfortable about how hot you find him.
So hot, but so creepy. Still so hot though.
5. Jessica Lange will appear and deliver an incredible one-liner.
Unless it’s Hotel, and you’ll start missing her desperately. Jessica, you’re a queen.
6. There will be a musical scene.
At first, you’ll be like “WTF?” but then you’ll get really into it.
7. Something seriously sad will happen to Sarah Paulson’s character.
She’ll be kidnapped, or gauge her eyes out, nearly murdered, or actually murdered. It will hurt your heart.
8. You’ll start wondering how the seasons are connected.
There may be subtle clues, and you’ll want to Google it to read conspiracy theories. Don’t toy with us, Ryan Murphy!
9. Evan Peters will get angsty, furthering your crush on him.
SWOON.
10. Emma Roberts will play a deliciously bitchy character, and you’ll live for it.
11. There will be something super sad that happens, and you’ll feel odd.
Isn’t this a horror show?! Why am I fighting back tears?!
12. Frances Conroy will be the underrated queen of the season.
Every season.
13. There will be an insane plot twist and you’ll wonder what just happened.
How can we recover from that?!!
14. There will be a scene that will make you so uncomfortable, you’ll flinch.
But then, you’ll love it and need to watch it again.
15. The finale will happen, and you’ll feel so many feelings.
It can’t be over — can it?!
16. You’ll eagerly wait for the next season.
Patiently, kind of. Right?!
17. People will ask you why you’re so obsessed with the show. You can’t explain it.
You tell them they just have to watch for themselves, and they’ll understand.
